I’m hella late to this party. However, what’s most important is that I made it. Released in 2019, Black Girls Must Die Exhausted trails the evolution of Tabitha Walker, a 33-year-old Black woman with aspirations of achieving the American Dream. You know, the husband, the kids, the gorgeous home with the white picket fence. When readers are first dropped into Tabitha’s world, she has finally saved up enough money for a down payment in Los Angeles’ pricy real estate market, she is in a steady relationship with a career-driven man who is “tall enough for kids,” and she is up for a promotion at her news station. From every vantage point, it appears that Tabby is on the precipice of receiving all of her heart’s desires. However, in true if-it’s-not-one-thing-it’s-another fashion, Tabby’s deck of cards comes tumbling down. Readers meet Tabby on one of the worst days of her life: The day she learned of her failing fertility. The news completely rocks her world and the snowball effect that follows is one in which many Black women in pursuit of “having it all” can likely relate.
Black Girls Must Die Exhausted is a page-turner. As a busy parent of two girls working a full-time job, I was able to finish this book in four days. That said, I listened to the audiobook version of this text. Shout out to voice narrator Makayla Cox, who did a masterful job of making Tabitha Walker jump off the pages. For four days straight, Tabby was with me when I washed dishes, prepared dinner, washed bottles and pump parts, packed preschool lunches, and prepped bottles. She was with me when I went to bed at night, while I worked in my office, as I walked across campus, and while I commuted to and from work with my two babies in the backseat. If I was physically reading this book, it probably would have taken me a bit longer just due to the sheer busy nature of my lifestyle, but there’s never a dull moment, so engagement will not be an issue.
“Black girls must die exhausted. There are so many battles to fight.”
Tabitha Walker
What I appreciated about Black Girls Must Die Exhausted is the dynamic nature of the characters. It was impossible to paint any character as all good or all bad. The storyline did not lazily rest on stereotypes about any particular group or personality type. Just when you thought you had a character figured out and you knew what they were going to do next, they surprised you. This book did not play into the tropes you would expect when reading a novel about the challenges of Black women and yet, I saw myself in every single character. I also saw many other Black women in my life. It made me reexamine my relationships and, in some instances, made me want to apologize to some folks. Real talk. The text explores the dynamics between Black women and Black men, Black women and their friends, married women and single women, Black women and grief, Black women and mental health, Black women trying to balance family and work, and so much more. I can recall at least two moments when I was moved to actual tears and one where I found my heart racing. That’s how masterfully Jayne Allen pieced this story together. It felt real.
I wasn’t halfway through the novel before I texted my 25-year-old to tell her I was sending a copy in the mail. At the time, I didn’t know how the book would end, but I knew it was an essential piece of literature that should be added to the Black girl syllabus.
I was satisfied with the ending and I was even more satisfied to know that there are two more books in the series: Black Girls Must Be Magic and Black Girls Must Have It All. I have every intention to follow the rest of Tabitha’s journey in pursuit of “having it all.”
I recommend Black Girls Must Die Exhausted to any Black woman. However, I highly recommend it to Millennials and Gen Z Black women. I wouldn’t say that anyone needs to go into reading Black Girls Must Die Exhausted seeking life-changing advice, but I do believe becoming intimate with its characters has the power to make you more self-aware of the choices you make and how you handle the people you care about – including yourself.
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